Category Archives: anniversaries

It’s All About The Boobs – Part I

Posted on by
11

I know, I know. It’s been two weeks since I tantalized you with the promise of three boob stories. Sorry to leave you hanging. [*snort* That made me think of the old song I used to sing to my mom, “Do your boobs hang low..." But I digress.] Without further ado, here is part one of the boob trilogy.

Button

For most of April and the first week of May I was lied to left and right. Todd lied to me, my friends lied to me, my kids lied to me… and I didn’t know. It’s a little scary how easily these people, people who supposedly care about me, could tell me falsehood after falsehood with a perfectly straight face. Let me give you a small sampling of the bevy of deceptions perpetrated against me.

Early April:

Katie
Katie: I need a tropical recipe for school for extra credit.
Me: How about Hawaiian Chicken? It’s easy and yummy.
Katie: Okay.

Late April:

Laura
Laura: Do you think Katie would want to babysit for us on the 7th?
Me: Probably. We have a surprise birthday party to go to, but I’m sure she would sit for you.
Laura: Great.
Me: So what are you going to do?
Laura: Bill and I are going on a date.
Me: Good for you!

Friday, May 7:

Taylor
Taylor: I’m going to Nick’s.
Me: Are you going to come to Mark’s party?
Taylor: Yeah. We’ll probably swing by at some point.

Todd
Todd: Katie just called and said there’s a leak under the sink at Bill and Laura’s.
Me: Oh, no.
Todd: She said it’s not bad. We’ll just stop on our way to Mark’s party and you can come in and see Laura’s new tile.
Me: Alright. I’ve been wanting to see it…

It went down like this: I walked up to the front door with Todd so I could “see Laura’s new tile while he checked under the sink.” When the door opened up there were all these people on the stairs and in the hall yelling “Surprise!” Turns out Todd had spearheaded a surprise party for me with some of our neighbors to celebrate five years of being cancer free. Mark’s wife, Amy, was in on it, too. She happened to be throwing a surprise 40th birthday party for him on the same night and even told him he was going to my surprise party.

They got me good! I had absolutely no inkling of their diabolical plan – the bunch of consummate fibbers. They had a luau for me, hence the Hawaiian Chicken recipe Katie wrangled out of me. Todd played the guitar while Katie sang “Grace” by Saving Jane – one of my favorite songs she sings. After that Taylor played his guitar some while we all sat around, eating and laughing and just having a good time. But the fun didn’t stop there. Oh, no it didn’t. There was also a cake. A boob cake.


(I blocked out the nipples ala Girls Gone Wild commercials so as not to offend the delicate sensibilities of my virtuous readers. Or reader. Whatever.)

And that’, mi amigos, is Part I. I promise to endeavor to attempt to try to get Part II up in a more timely manner.

Five Years Ago Today…

Posted on by
14

Five years ago today I had the life-saving surgery to remove the cancerous tumor from my body. Not only was the malignancy removed, my entire left breast was removed.

Five years ago today I had a huge incision across the concave side of my chest and a drainage tube at each end. Of course, five years ago today I didn’t actually see the incision. That happened five years ago tomorrow.

Five years ago today we didn’t know exactly what we were dealing with – if the cancer had spread and what kind of treatment I’d have to go through.

Five years ago today I had a lot of questions. Or at least I think I had a lot of questions. Five years ago today I was on pretty good meds so I might not have had any questions other than when I’d get the next happy pill.

Five years ago today I knew my life had been forever altered, but I had no idea to what extent. Five years ago today I figured I’d go through treatment – whatever that might mean – and eventually everything would be back to normal.

Five years ago today I was a little delusional.

Five years ago today somebody stole my pink ribbon car magnet off the back of my van while I was having a mastectomy.

Five years ago today the surgical waiting room was full of people I love with all my heart. Those people prayed for me, they told stories about me and they ate my peanut M&Ms.

Five years ago today I assured those people I love that everything would be okay as I left them at the surgical waiting room on my way back to pre-op. (I might not have been quite so magnanimous had I known they were going to eat my peanut M&Ms.)

Five years ago today I sang “I Want To Be Sedated” as they wheeled me into the operating room. At least that’s the story Todd tells. With my history it’s very likely.

Five years ago today my sister, Terri, and my Mother-In-Law went shopping and bought me all sorts of beautiful things to make my recovery as pleasant as possible.

More than five years ago today I believed Todd loved me and God would see us through this whole ordeal.

Five years ago today was the start of that belief turning into knowledge.

Today is a huge day for me. Five years in the life of a cancer survivor is a big thing. It’s that magic day when the risk of recurrence or metastasis is reduced. I like the sound of that.

But…

Today is the day after Lynn Redgrave died from breast cancer.

Today I have breast cancer sisters with recurrences and metastases.

Today I’m thrilled to have made it to five years with my four favorite words, “No Evidence of Disease”, but I can’t help but think of those who haven’t been so fortunate.

So…

Today I will celebrate my milestone.

Today I will enjoy the beautiful roses Todd bought me.

Today I will relish every kind comment either in person or on my Facebook status.

Today I will thank God for my good health.

And…

Sunday I will walk in the Philadelphia Race for the Cure for every woman I know who has dealt/is dealing with this disease.

Today Todd gave me a dozen red roses and five pink roses:

Today Todd gave me five more pink roses for my bedside table:

Today it’s good to be me.

Crossposted at Mothers With Cancer

Turning a Corner

Posted on by
12

It’s nearly 11:00 and I really should be in bed, but I had to tell you this!

After about a week of restless sleeping, last night was great. I slept like a rock! But it made it very difficult to get up this morning. A couple hours of consciousness and two cups of coffee didn’t make much of a dent in the heavy fog that enveloped me.

As I went about my day I kept thinking there was something significant about today – June 2nd. A tickle in the back of my mind which I just attributed to the mental sludge I waded though. There’s a lot going on at work right now – two weeks of preschool camps; gearing up for Kids’ Camp; services starting up in the new building this Sunday – I decided it was the organized chaos of the many activities.

And then I received the following text message from my friend, Beth:


Cancer sucks. Remembering your first chemo tx. I’m so glad it’s behind you. You are a champion, my friend… Love you bunches.


That was it!! That’s what I was forgetting to remember. Four years ago today I had my first chemotherapy treatment. This is the first time in that four years I haven’t thought about or even remembered what was then a myriad of significant dates related to my cancer.

It may not seem like a big thing, but to me it’s huge. Poor Beth felt bad for reminding me, but I’m glad she did. It felt good to realize I had forgotten just why June 2nd was significant. I’m no longer a cancer patient, I haven’t been for a long time. But it’s only been the last nine months or so that I’ve actually felt like something other than a breast cancer survivor. Today only served to prove to myself I’m really moving on.

Oh, and Beth. I love you bunches, too!!

Cross-posted at Mothers with Cancer

Happy Cancerversary To Me

Posted on by
16

I posted this over at Mothers With Cancer and I figured, “Hey! Why not post it here, too?”

Today marks the four year anniversary of my survivorship. Everybody seems to have differing ideas of when that starts, but my family has always considered the day I had the cancer removed from my body as the day I became a survivor. So I awoke to eight red and four pink roses.

I still have times when I mourn what I’ve lost or get angry at how my body has aged with stiffness and arthritis, but those emotions come less and less. The events of four years ago seem surreal, almost no big deal at times. Funny how my husband never sees it that way.

But while my body has healed and my life has moved past the crisis, my head hit a little glitch. I found myself in a perpetual funk that I couldn’t seem to shake. I’d never dealt with clinical depression and had always been able to pull myself out of the pit we all find ourselves in from time to time. But this time there was no escaping. I finally accepted that I was probably depressed.

When I explained my lack of interest and blase’ attitude to my doctor she acknowledged what I had already figured out. Not a bad depression – it wasn’t affecting my relationships (much) or my work – but a depression nonetheless. I told her how ridiculous it is when everything is so much better than it was just a couple of years ago. I wasn’t depressed then, why should I be depressed now? Easy, she said. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I was in survival mode for so long, doing what I had to do, that now I have the time to be depressed (Greatly paraphrased here.)

I’m now on the very mildest of antidepressants and it seems to be doing the trick. I’ve started slowly shedding the pounds I gained with treatment and the following medical issues I had. My life is about all sorts of things other than cancer and my husband and I are training to do the Philadelphia 3Day in October.

I finally feel more like a thriver and not just a survivor!

Happy Anniversary, Anniversary, Anniversary

Posted on by
10

I really shouldn’t be here. I have to figure out what activity we’re going to do tomorrow at Dino Camp. I’ve got Thursday and Friday covered, but not tomorrow. Not to worry, though. I’ll think of something!!

The beginning of June is just one anniversary after another and I couldn’t let it slide by without notice. Two out of the three are worth celebrating and depending on your perspective, maybe the third is, too.

June 2: I had my first chemo treatment three years ago yesterday. I’ll just look at that as a positive because, well, here I am.

June 3: We moved to Pennsylvania – into this house – as a family after a year of seeing Todd every other weekend or so two years ago today. I love the neighborhood, the house, the area, etc., but the best part is actually living together!

June 4: Todd and I will have been married 20 years tomorrow. How is that possible?? As of this moment we have no plans of celebrating. At least not yet. Most likely we’ll just postpone the festivities (i.e., nice dinner out) until we’re in Hawaii.

Okay. Now that that’s out of the way I can concentrate on figuring out what to do tomorrow at camp.

Later!

My Week In Arkansas, Part Two

Posted on by
13

I’m not sure what my deal is, but I’m having the hardest time getting the Arkansas trip written. In fact I’m having the hardest time getting anything written. Or done. I think I’ll blame the puppy.

When we last parted I was regaling you with my wallpaper faux pas. Let’s move past that, okay?

Friday, April 25:

After a stout cup of coffee and cereal, Shelli and I went back to work. She worked on the entryway while I continued to angrily rip gently pull the rest of the wallpaper from the kitchen wall. Mom and Dad went to pick Terri up at the airport and Rhonda showed up to see my mess handiwork. I think I’d finished the removal and had done a bit of Spackling and sanding, preparing the wall for the next step. But I didn’t have what I needed for the next step so Rhonda drove me to Lowe’s for primer. Used to be when I got in this predicament I would buy some drywall mud and mix it with the paint. That worked pretty good, but it made the wall almost too textured. This day, however, we found wall texture specifically made to mix with paint. So I bought that, a can of primer and voila!!

Terri was at the house when we returned from Lowes. She tried to convince me and Michele that she came to supervise, but two against one trumps the oldest. So Shelli worked on the hallway (the entryway was finished and looked great!), I set out to redeem myself and Terri started taping the eating area.

After I got the textured primer applied I began to relax. It looked pretty much like a regular wall so I knew most likely I was going to get to go home the following Tuesday. Which was a good thing because I was almost getting those little tiny twinges you get when you kinda, sorta miss someone.

Terri did trimming, I did trimming, Shelli did trimming, Terri did taping, I did painting, Shelli did painting, Terri did painting, I did taping, Shelli did more painting. We had four areas to paint and it was nice to have three of us always with something to do.

I wish I had taken notes while I was there like I’d meant to do, but the slave drivers my sisters cracked the whip so I wouldn’t have had time to write anything anyway. Since I know somebody will tell on me I’ll confess right now that I did take frequent Sudoku breaks. However, they were only to keep my brain sharp against the dulling effects of paint fumes. Anyway, since I didn’t keep a paint trip journal I’m a little sketchy on when we finished one project and started another, etc. Not to worry, though. I’m pretty sure Terri or Michele will be perfectly happy to fill in any gaps.

What I know for absolutely positive (because how could I forget) is we had a delicious roast with vegetables and salad for dinner that night. And what roast beast meal would be complete without following up with ice cream later? So the three of us hopped into the folks’ car and drove to Baskin Robbins. My sisters had to decide what flavor they wanted while all I wanted was Vanilla. “Boring”, you say? Quite the contrary!! Vanilla ice cream, melted chunky peanut butter and chocolate syrup. Now THAT’S delicioso!!

Once again we stayed up too late.

Saturday, April 26:

At the risk of being redundant, we trimmed. And taped. And painted. I believe this was the day we put the finishing touches on the dining area. My parents have cathedral ceilings in the living room and we had to do one side at a time. So I trimmed one of the “triangles” on Saturday.

We couldn’t get too into the painting because we had some major celebrating to do. We worked for a couple of few hours and then cleaned up so we could take our parents to dinner for their 55th anniversary. Yup. You read that right. Fifty-five years. We took them to the same restaurant the family went to five years earlier after their 50th anniversary party.

I was driving so instead of going straight home after dinner I took the scenic route past our old house. It’s still as cute as ever. *sigh* I miss my wide front porch. And the most beautiful redbud tree I’ve ever seen still grows in the front.

Comfy jammies, conversation and ice cream completes day four. I’ll try not to go so long before the final installment of the My Week in Arkansas chronicles.

It’s Been Three Years

Posted on by
20

Tomorrow I will officially be a three year breast cancer survivor. I’ve already told the story about the day I became a survivor – the day the cancer and surrounding tissue, i.e., my breast, were removed from my body. But if you missed it and have a few minutes to kill you can read it here.

Todd came home early today and made me go hide upstairs for a few minutes. When he called me with the all clear I found pink roses on the stairs. When I got to the family room there was this beautiful bouquet waiting for me.

Here’s a better picture of the actual roses. A dozen red roses and three pink roses.

I can hardly wait for my 13th year because then I’ll get TWO dozen roses!!

And here are the other nine pink roses:

I guess I already got my two dozen roses, didn’t I?

Since I’m a three year survivor, that means my mom is a two year survivor.

WE ROCK, MOM!!

Blogiversary, Update and Announcement

Posted on by
22

BLOGIVERSARY

A year ago today I published my first post. I can’t believe I’ve been doing this for 365 days. Tara Marie and Amanda inspired me to start it and my purpose was mainly to keep family and friends who are scattered across the country updated on our happenings here in Pennsylvania. It’s turned into so much more, though.

So happy blogiversary to me!! Where’s my cake??

UPDATE

My new additions have yet to make their debut. Friday I’ll be able to take the tape and dressings off and get some idea of what I may eventually look like. And Susan, they are supposedly permanently semi-erect. I guess I’ll always be sort of cold but not really cold for the rest of my life.

I believe I’ve taken yet another step in permanently scarring my children. Monday night we were gathering around the table for dinner and everyone was talking about their day when I said, “Mom got new nipples today. Taylor, would you please pray?”

ANNOUNCEMENT

Last, and maybe least, but probably not to most of you, though others of you will be indifferent, is this big news.

It is with great hesitation and not just a little trepidation I announce that Todd has started his own blog today. Jenni & Me, based on the book Marley and Me – you know, about a dog. Hmm…

So if you have a chance, go over and say hello, but don’t believe everything you read. M’kay??

Nineteen Years and Counting

Posted on by
25

Nineteen years ago today Todd and I were married. It truly was one of the happiest days of my life. Two years before our wedding Todd had moved from Southern California to Arkansas where he had multitudes of aunts, uncles and cousins. At that time I was twenty and he was twenty-one and 1600 miles just seemed too far to maintain a relationship. So we broke up. However, we still wrote letters and talked on the phone weekly. He dated. I dated. We were both miserable.

Every time I got ready for a date I would wish it was Todd I was going out with. It was horrible. I finally decided I had to tell him we couldn’t go on like we were. Either we had a relationship or we didn’t. And if we didn’t I couldn’t talk to him anymore because it was too hard.

When the phone rang at its usual time I took a deep breath and answered, prepared to tell him what I had to. But before I had a chance he said, “I can’t take this any more. Will you move out here?” That filled me with bubbles of giddiness. Truly. Bubbles. Not just any bubbles. Giddy bubbles.

But as thrilled as I was at his unhappiness (I know that sounds awful, but that’s the truth of it), I wasn’t about to pull up stakes and move 1600 miles away from everything and everyone I knew. So six months after he moved I went to visit. I wanted to know if our feelings had been romanticized by the long distance or if they were the real thing.

They were, as it turns out, the real thing. So we got engaged with plans to marry the next summer when he was out of school. But I had a great job and was getting great experience and was trying to finish school myself. And I guess I freaked out a little. So we set the date for June 4, 1988.

A two year long distance romance is not something I would necessarily recommend. However, by the time we did get married we were as sure as you can be. We both knew this was exactly what we wanted.

Ah… So young, so in love… (This isn’t actually the picture I wanted to post. I hate to admit this – mostly because my mom reads this blog and now she’ll know – but I can’t find my wedding album. I know it’s around here somewhere in a box. And I don’t have an excuse for not finding it yet because we moved in a year ago yesterday. But I’m sad to say I haven’t finished unpacking. OH! But I did find the box of books I’ve been wanting for the last several months.)

It’s been a wonderful 19 years. Oh, we’ve hit a few bumps here and there, but nothing that any marriage doesn’t go through. Especially when you’re still growing up. LOL! And I’m looking forward to seeing what the next 19 years bring. I know when we got married I didn’t think I could love him any more. But I was wrong. So I wonder how I’ll feel about him in another 19 years.

Katie has a play off game tonight so we’ll be celebrating with hot dogs and sodas from the concession stand. It just doesn’t get more romantic than that. Someday when we have the time we’ll truly celebrate by going out to a nice dinner and just spending some time as us. I can’t wait!