Catching Up

Okay. I’ve only got a little time to tell you what’s been going on. I’ll start with Wednesday. That was my trip in to Philly to have my tattoos touched up and the hair under my arms zapped into oblivion. The ride into the city was pleasant and uneventful. I’m telling you, give me some good tunes and a minimum of stupid drivers and I am one happy woman.

Ylena did the tattoo touch ups first. I asked her if she ever had any strange requests for smiley faces or Celtic knots or anything and she said no. Which is a good thing because all she knows how to do are circles. But she does that really well. I am a bit surprised at how real things are starting to look. It’s the first time in nearly three years that I think I look “normal”. Oh, I still have funky scars and will for some time, but I look less like a doll and more like a real person. AND there is no more yak belly hair.

Which leads me to the laser hair removal. Ayechiwawa that hurt!! Not the breast part because there’s not really any feeling there. But the underarms! Cripes!! Though not all of it. I would think, “this isn’t so bad” and then ZAP! I could actually hear the hair frying! And oy, the smell! Burning hair has quite the nasty odor. She did the left armpit first and just when I didn’t think I could take anymore she put an ice pack under there and moved to the right side. That side didn’t seem to be as bad and I think it’s because of some strange nerve sensations since having lymph nodes removed from the left a few years ago.

I go back the first week in May for my second session. I may be less than thrilled at the thought of more sizzling pain, but the end results are well worth it. No more shaving or Veeting for me!!

The drive home from Philadelphia wasn’t too bad except I was behind some bonehead who had to be drunk or high or something. Nobody drives that bad. Seriously. He nearly hit the center divider a number of times until he moved into the right lane. Then he kept driving on the shoulder, swerving back into his lane and over compensating by veering into the left lane. I was relieved when he took an exit, but then felt guilty I hadn’t called 911 because he was dangerous.

Thursday was my thyroid biopsy. Radioactive Girl had given me good advice and an idea of what to expect and I was thankful for that. The unknown and speculation is always much worse than reality.

I laid on a table with my head back as far as it would go, the ultrasound technician on the right and the radiologist on the left. She pressed the wand onto my neck while the doctor poked around with his finger to figure out where he wanted to go in. He had me turn my head as far to the right as I could and then he sprayed the area with a freezing agent. So freezing that it kind of burned. Then the real fun began.

I didn’t feel the needle going in, but I could feel it inside, fishing around for the right spot to extract the questionable cells. The ultrasound tech told me not to swallow or talk. Don’t you know after that I had an insane urge to swallow. The doctor took two samples from one nodule and two samples from another nodule. In between samples the tech would say, “Now swallow as much as you can!” Which was funny because it’s really hard to swallow on command and that’s why she was saying it.

The doctor kept saying, “This just doesn’t look like anything to worry about. I really think these are complex cysts.” There was a pathologist in the room as well to make sure he was getting enough cells for the samples, but she couldn’t say yay or nay. I’ll get the final word near the end of next week, but I’m not concerned at all. I’ve had these things for ten years and they’ve hardly changed a bit. Which makes me wonder why I went through the pain and hassle in the first place. But I just figure it’s my little jab to the insurance company. (Hope they don’t read this!)

Afterwards my neck was a little sore and I’m kind of bruised, but nothing terrible. It’s uncomfortable to yawn and, just like the swallowing thing, makes me want to yawn all the time. But it’s over with and I hope to never have this done ever again. I did get that Venti Decaf White Chocolate Mocha with Whip, though!

Now for the really big news! I have succumbed. We’re picking up our new puppy in about an hour. A Norwegian Elkhound mix from a rescue shelter. She’s a very cute and fluffy little thing. I have to admit I’m getting a bit excited. If for no other reason than I’ll have cute pictures and fun stories for my blog. Hopefully fun for me as well as you. Now if we all can only agree on a name.