HAIR’S THE DEAL
I am in the midst of a parental dilemma. Taylor has hair issues and I’m trying to be a good mom, letting him be himself. **rolling eyes**
He’s 15-years-old and likes his hair on the long side. The front of his hair slants down over his eyes and he’s constantly doing the Shrek 2 Prince Charming thing. You know where he turns his head left and down for the momentum he needs to throw it back to the right and toss his blonde locks to the side. Or as I tell him, “You look like Farrah Fawcett when you do that.”
Todd has been on him for the last several years about his hair and Taylor would very reluctantly (read be forced to) cut his hair short. I finally told Todd to leave Taylor alone. It’s only hair. He’s a good kid and we should be proud of him, girlish hair notwithstanding. I’m of that whole pick-your-battles philosophy and frankly, in the grand scheme of things, long hair on a boy just isn’t worth arguing over. We need to be taking this time of peace to stock the armory, so to speak.
I’ve taken to reminding Todd that he had longish hair when he was in Junior High. He had that whole Southern California Sun Bleached Surfer Boy thing going on. It just seems a little hypocritical to me.
I think Todd worries Taylor will be wrongly judged because he has long hair. That maybe teachers will think he’s a stoner and other parents will think he’s a punk. And I wonder how much of his problem is how it reflects on him as the father. Don’t we all as parents do that more than we care to admit?
The conflict I’m having is that, while I do firmly believe it’s only hair, I don’t like it. I just don’t think he looks good with long hair. But he’s enough like me that I know for a fact if we bug him about it he’ll keep growing it out, even if he doesn’t like it, either. (Just one personal issue I need to work on)
I will give him this, though. When he’s playing bass guitar in the band he looks kind of cool. Like a real rocker. LOL! Maybe not so much in this picture of him playing air guitar on Mother’s Day, but you get the idea.
(BTW – the wallpaper you see in the background is temporary. But that will be for another post on another day.)
Let me leave you all with another Taylorism. This would be a typical comment on any given day:
He had a school band concert the other night and was wearing dress pants, dress shirt, tie, etc. Right before he walked out the door he said, “Yeah. I look like I had a swirly in the sexy toilet.”
**Edit** Actually, what he said was “… I had a swirly in a toilet full of sexy.” Don’t know that it makes any difference, but there you have it.
A swirly in the sexy toilet huh? Well, that’s a new one on me!! I think you are right to let him grow his hair the way he wants but I can see how it could be VERY trying!
LOL – when my boys were younger and went through the hair thing – my ‘issue’ was the exact opposite. From the age they were able to do their own thing, they would keep their hair real, real, real short. I was always asking them if they couldn’t let it grow a little more. (they never did). Our oldest would cut his hair real short and then bingo dob his head. We had 2 or 3 bingo dobbers as bathroom accessories. He finally stopped when I told him the ink would leak into his brain (I don’t know if it would have or not – I just thought it a real stupid thing to do *g*)And for what it’s worth – I’d let him win the hair disagreement. There are bigger battles that we have to fight as parents so let them think they are winning the little ones and we parents stick to our guns on the big ones It’s a bit more give and take that way.And even though mine are 26 and 28 now, they still keep their hair shorter than I would like them too *g*
Aww I’d let the kid have his hair the way he wants. At least he hasn’t dyed it black or shaved it into a mohawk or worse.When I was his age I dyed my hair weekly with strawberry koolaid and shaved off just one side of it. You can imagine how hideous it looked and it pissed off my mom to no end. That was one of it’s main attractions.
PB&J Boats – Thanks for visiting. And yes, sometimes it’s very difficult to keep my mouth shut. LOLKristie – My sister had the same problem with her boys. LOL. If it’s not one extreme it’s another. And really, Taylor’s hair isn’t that long. It’s just in his eyes. Blech!Pru – I know, I know. And that’s exactly why I won’t tell him I don’t like it. As long as he thinks it’s no big deal to me we’re good. LOL
You’ve got the right idea, even if it does bug you… I totally have the image of him doing the prince charming thing, though. Good descriptive blogging!!The swirly/sexy toilet comment cracks me up. Funny kid!
Monnik – it’s so funny because when I pick him up from school I look around and there are all these high school boys flipping their hair around like I used to in 7th grade! :o)And he is funny. He’s usually good for at least one laugh a day.
Atleast his long hair is straight and falls straight down, my brother has kinky hair and it’s all froey and not cute.And the long hair definitely goes with the rock band thing too…=)
I dunno, Rowena. One of his friends has a blonde fro and he’s pretty cute. I’m thinkin’ the chicks dig him! LOL
Jenster- Long hair on guys is all the rage. ESPECIALLY if the ‘rents are on ’em about it. If it’s long enough to comb over their eyes? All the better. Our oldest (plus several boys at our church) did this for a year or so & I hated every second of it, but I didn’t dare make a fuss over it for fear he’d grow it longer than mine. LOLLuckily for me, his GF doesn’t like it & he cut it. Thank the Lord.
LOL, Amanda. Todd has convinced him to trim it so the hair is no longer than the bridge of his nose and he can wait until school’s out. He seems okay with that.
It would drive me crazy, too, but you’re right–there are bigger battles. Plus, if you make a big deal out of it, he’ll just want to do it more. Hopefully he’ll get tired of it on his own in six months and chop it all off himself 🙂
Yeah they’re all wearing their hair long now days.. It kind of drives me nuts when I see my youngest brother trying to grow his hair out. He doesn’t have the nice bone-straight hair ideal for these particular styles, so he ends up looking like he’s wearing a big brown football helmet. He’s also a rather skinny kid so he’d be easily confused for a lollipop. I’ll be glad when the fad passes to be quite honest..
Jen, my Shmoo has done it all. We’ve had the E-mo stage…tight girl pants and he straightened his long wavy hair and plastered it to his head. It’s been a mop top like the Beatles, had blonde streaks in it and just this weekend he cut it all off. It’s been wicked hot here already and he’s a runner and he just couldn’t stand the hair with the heat.Shmoo and Taylor sound like they have alot in common because as sure as the sun rises in the morning if we’d nagged him to cut his hair Shmoo would probably be wearing braids to bed.Since Taylor is such a good kid you probably have nothing to worry about. He’ll get tired of it and shoving it out of his face.BTW, Shmoo plays guitar too and one of the things he hated was his hair being in his eyes when he played.
First, the kid’s a riot :DSecond, long is in big time. Even at our little school with a strict dress code and short hair requirements (not in eyes or below collar), Sister has given up trying to get the older boys, 6th-8th grade, to keep their hair cut short. Third, Kristie I’ve never heard of bingo dabbing hair. What colors did the boys use??
It does sound like hair is the least of your worries. At least it’s not lice. My daughter came home with a note from her school letting us know a classmate has lice. AAAAUUUGGGHHH!!!! At least it’s right at the end of school so there’s not going to be much to miss (if she does have to miss anything). I’ve told my daughter that if she gets lice, I’m shaving her head. She wasn’t too happy about that. And frankly, she has such gorgeous hair I’m not sure I could do it. But I’m not telling her that!!!!ROCK ON, TAYLOR!!!! WOO HOO!!!!
I agree about picking your battles…But…I HATE LONG HAIR ON BOYS!But…he’s 15 & it’s his hair.Maybe you could encourage him to get it trimmed around his eyes so that he doesn’t have to constantly toss his hair about like a girl.And, from what I understand…the longer hair on boys is in now…
Tara: It was just the oldest one and he had green and red bingo daubers. His colour of preference was the red one. He mostly just looked like someone had smacked him on the head a lot.
My 12 year old girl is growing out her bangs. She has had her hair in her eyes for about 6 months…makes me a little bit nuts…makes her grandma TOTALLY nuts. They are finally long enough for her to clip them back…WOOHOO!You have my deepest sympathy LOLOLDeb C
First of all – that is my new saying – I had a swirly in a toilet full of sexy! I am going to say it to everyone, all the time…even when it’s not appropriate! Hahahahahha!Ahhh…I am of the school of thought where you should let kids be who they are. I think when you are a kid you identify yourself on such a small scale as opposed to adults. The smallest thing, such as style of hair, could be that kids whole identity. Having such a small identity scale, it could be somewhat devastating and life altering in their mind if told that it looks bad or they must change it. Does that make any sense? Anyhow, I like your choose your battles philosophy. 🙂
I love your son! You are totally right about not bugging him. I remember many things my parents bugged me to do or not do and I did the opposite just because I am rebellious like that. It is only hair, as hard as that may be when it is your kid. Please remind me I said this when I eventually write the post teling you that my son has decided he wants long hair. He is 7. I am against it mainly because he still has such a baby face that I believe he would be mistaken for a girl. I’ll leave it up to you to remind me that I actually love long haired guys, and that I told you “it’s only hair” when I complain about his. I know I can count on you, right?
Really? Well then I’m stumped! LOL…that’s what is cute these days?Hmmm….
Coming way late to this, Jenster… We’re going through this with our oldest right now, too. I’m with you on the pick the battles thing. I hate his hair, too. But, he’s a straight A student, has great friends, overall is a really good kid. So, he wants his hair long. BFD. We tie it into his attitude. If his attitude sucks, we make him cut his hair. Keeps him on the straight and narrow LOL. We did take a pic of him from behind when we were in Seattle last year and he freaked. :OMG I look like a girl!!!” prompted a haircut LOL… which he promptly grew out *g*