My Happy Place is a River Called Denial

Two weeks from today will be a Monday much like every other Monday. Except Taylor will be six hours away at school. I’m very proud of him and super excited for him, but if I think about it too long I’m sad for me. It’s going to be very strange around here.

Back in the spring he had narrowed his choices down to two. A local college and one in Southern Virginia. Katie tried to bribe him into choosing the local college with the promise that she’d bake him the pie of his choice every day. While tempting, it wasn’t enough to sway his decision.

So now my baby boy, who hasn’t actually been a baby for a long time, is spreading his wings and leaving the nest. This may be how it’s supposed to be, but I don’t have to like it. He’s my boy. He thinks and acts like me – not always a good thing – and he’s nearly always good for a laugh.

And poor Todd. He’s distraught about losing the hormonal balance in the house, not to mention his scary-movie-watching, guitar-playing, sport-talking buddy.

Then there’s Katie. At times she feels like she’s losing her best friend. Other times she feels like she’s getting rid of her arch nemesis. Sometimes at the same time

The closer the time comes to drive him down to college the more real everything is becoming. My jokes about turning his room into a craft room/office/library/whatever have lost their humor and I find myself thinking about all the things I wish I would have done different. As my sister once told me about her kids, only by the grace of God has Taylor grown into the young man he has because it sure wasn’t anything I did.

Sunday night will be bittersweet as it will be his last night to play in the youth worship band. Then it will be five days full of packing, gathering the last minute stuff, hanging out with his friends and just being the four of us for the last time until Thanksgiving.

I can’t wait for Thanksgiving.

(*the photo of Taylor & Katie was taken by Gail Anne Photography)


  1. Becky on August 10, 2010 at 12:23 am

    Feel for ya. And Todd. And Katie.Dang melancholia that threatens to cause even me to shed a couple of tears for you and it's not even my baby going off to college…but just knowing that prospect is only a few short school years away. As we speak he's 'practicing his driving' in our driveway. Phooey on growing up. He sure is a handsome boy.

  2. His Girl on August 10, 2010 at 12:39 am

    yah, ditto on the phooey.I don't like this post. Not because it isn't well written (it really is very nicely written) and not because I'm being rational (because I am certainly not) but because it is real and I don't like the kind of real in which those moments you were excited about/dreading come up and look you in the eye.and by you, I mean you… but I actually mean me, since I'm just 2 short years behind ya.ick.will be praying for your momma heart.

  3. Lori on August 10, 2010 at 1:25 am

    Wow. He'll do wonderfully well because you and Todd have done such a fantastic job raising him. The fact that he's ready to spread his wings out there means you've done your job well.Not that it makes it any easier. Sending you virtual hugs.

  4. Anonymous on August 10, 2010 at 8:43 am

    I'm going to be honest with you all…..this is killing me. I find myself tearing up whenever I think about him being away. Taylor an I have a special relationship that has grown stonger and stronger over the years and his migration into manhood. Next to Jennifer, he is my best friend and I will miss him terribly!!Starting to tear up again….gotta go.Todd (aka: Very-Sad-Dad)

  5. Terri on August 10, 2010 at 9:15 am

    I feel for you, it's tough, tough, tough when you are forced to let that first one go. And, Ben was older before he flew my nest. Prayers for you all.

  6. Monnik on August 10, 2010 at 4:33 pm

    This post has me holding my breath. And Todd's comment wrecked me.You both have amazing kids yes, by the grace of God, but also because they have wonderful parents.What an exciting time for Taylor. And what a bittersweet time for you and Todd.

  7. Carpool Queen on August 10, 2010 at 5:07 pm

    Hon -My heart aches just reading this. And I have 7 years to go before I'm in your shoes.

  8. The Daily Bee on August 11, 2010 at 12:04 pm

    🙁 Some changes are a huge bummer. You, the mama, are a huge part in who he is today and he will take that with him. He may be leaving the nest but he's well equipped, I'm sure. Hang in there!

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