We drove through the snow today to get what will hopefully be my last ever Zoladex injection. And like most things, it wasn’t quite as bad as I had imagined. Don’t get me wrong! It was bad enough that I deserve sympathy! (How shameless was that?) Just not as bad as it could have been.
I sat on the exam table while two nurses looked at my belly, trying to figure out where to place the implant. It has to be under the skin, but not into the muscle. My post-surgical belly is definitely not flat, but the nurses couldn’t find enough “fat” to pinch.
**Uh, yeah. Gisele just called and she wants her abs of steel back.**
They finally decided on the area below my incision which is still swollen from surgery. She was able to get a good pinch in there. This is a picture of the spring-loaded needle they use. (Again – I’m looking for sympathy here, though this picture doesn’t do it justice)After they’ve got a fair amount of flesh between their fingers, they s*l*o*w*l*y insert a needle that looks just like the elephant tranquilizers I used to see on Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom. Once the needle is right where they want it, they push the button and SNAP! The medicine is spring-loaded into your hide and then the breath you didn’t realize you’ve been holding is released in one big WHOOSH.
Todd stood by and let me crush his hand while I stared at him out of my right eye because my left eye was squeezed tight and my face was all scrunched up. As if contorting my face this way somehow alleviates the pain. I’m sure all it really does is cause more wrinkles.
But I think the worst is yet to come. I still have to remove the band aid. While I was happy they didn’t have to mess with my tender belly, I’m afeared yanking the band aid off will be akin to a bikini wax. Maybe if I just leave it alone it will fall off on its own after a few showers.
So now that’s over and my next step is to see the gynecologist next Thursday to find out when I can have my blasted hysterectomy. Hopefully it will be within the next month so I don’t have to go through this yet again.